Saturday, January 19, 2008

Will You Fight For It?

Just when I think that I am getting it...I find that I am not.

The past few weeks have been super busy for me. The worst part about it is, is that it has all been in my head. My mind has been the most busy part of me that I can't even think straight sometimes.

At my bible study this past week we were talking about Repentance and our TAWG. Time Alone With God. And what we do to make it happen everyday. What holds us back from achieving it everyday.

Repenting is not easy for anyone I think. I know that I hate to be wrong and admitting it is something that doesn't feel very good to me. I often times brush it off and think to myself that God seen what I had done so I say a quick I'm sorry and go about my life. But, it has been brought to my attention that saying I'm sorry is not something that we should say so loosely. The true meaning of "I'm Sorry" is that we sincerely mean that we will never do it again. Never again! We bump into someone at the store-"oops, I'm sorry", we are late for dinner- "oh, I'm so sorry", we break something of someones- "oh man, I'm sorry"... Why, we don't honestly mean that we will never do it again, we say it to be nice and to let the offended person know that we made a mistake.

Why don't I take more care in the way that I ask forgiveness from my Heavenly Father? I have been feeling convicted about this lately. I can not ask Him to forgive me the same way I ask other people to forgive me. He deserves a more meaningful, truly sincere I'm sorry. One that I will remember so that I can turn away from that behavior.

TAWG- that and Repentance tie together. To get to the place that I am truly sorry, I need the time alone with God. Time is something that everyone feels that they are out of. No time to do this, no time to do that...no, no, no! It is critical that we have TAWG. CRITICAL! We can not grow in the Body if we don't have time. And we can not afford to not grow. It all comes down to one question...Are we willing to fight for it?

Most of us carve out time to do devotions and bible studies, but do we carve out time to just sit with Him? To listen to His voice, and to feel His presence? And, are we carving out enough?

I am not.

I need to get in a nice quiet place, and get in my "quiet place" inside myself, and dig really deep, find the sin that God is leading me to and carry it (my cross) up my mountain of pride and set it before Him. How, after carrying that heavy burden, can I not mean what I say, when I say, "I'm sorry Father!"?

This blog is very important to me. I'm writing it because it is personal and very much a struggle in my life right now. I need to remember to fight for my time, to not let evil take it from me.

"Whatever keeps me from my Bible is my enemy, however harmless it may appear to be...Let the cares of life crowd out the Scriptures from my mind and I have suffered loss where I can least afford it." A W Tozer

Monday, January 7, 2008

All I want for 2008...

Well, its a brand new year. I have been really thinking about what this new year has in store for me.

I have been growing spiritually closer to God this past year more than ever. It has been awesome! God has done some great things in my life. I have a better sense of who I am, yet, I am still learning who I am. I have felt His unconditional love, His grace and His mercy.

God has revealed things to me about myself that I need to fix. He has little by little shown me the raw truth of Sarah. Even when He shows me things that I hate to see, I love Him so much for doing it. God is that friend that tells you when you have pepper in your teeth! Only your best friends will tell you if you do, the ones that really don't matter, they wont tell you.

For 2008, I want to remember every day that God is my best friend. I want to remember that my secret is always safe with Him, and that He loves me no matter what it is. I want 2008 to bring me closer and closer to Him. I want to trust in Him with everything that I am. I want to become more aware of who I am in Christ. I want to bring people closer to Christ so that they too can have what I have. I want to learn how to love like He loves me.
I want a little more of Him in the middle of me!

Happy Belated New Year Everyone!!!!